Potatoes The Fat, and the Fattening
by nila.nithila
Summary: Shinou is bored. Yuri is gullible. Murata's sick of baby-sitting. Featuring the wonderfully fat, very fattening vegetable; the potato!
1. The Curse Of The Undefeatable Potato

Hello! This is a story that my sister wrote. We both came up with the idea one random day. I hope you like it! (I've written an epilogue for it)

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"Aargh!"

Yuri sat up straight. He didn't know if it was possible, but for some reason, that sounded strangely like a...

...potato.

******

"YURI!"

"What?" Yuri rolled over sleepily and sat up.

"HOW LONG ARE YOU GOING TO SLEEP YOU...."

"I'm coming, Wolfram, stop yelling already!" He got up, yawned, stretched, and got dressed. He was feeling really sleepy. Potatoes had been haunting his dreams. In one of them, he was being chased by a giant potato that kept calling him a wimp, and he ran into a dead end, and then the potato breathed fire, but it(the fire) stopped right in front of him, turned around, and COOKED the potato. Conrad appeared out of no where and tasted it. He said it was delicious. The other dream...he didn't want to think about it.

"Heika!"

"Good Morning Everyone,"

"Oh, Heika! You took such a long time! I thought..." Gunter's voice trailed off.

Yuri sat down. "Geez, I'm hungry! What's for breakfast?"

"Baked potatoes, mashed potatoes, boiled potatoes, sliced potatoes, steamed potatoes, half-boiled potatoes, fried potatoes,...Heika, is something wrong?" Conrad looked at Yuri's horrified face.

"Nn..No...It's nothing," Yuri replied.

"Are you sure?"

"Seriously, it's nothing," he began to pile his plate with potatoes. _Potatoes. _What was with those dreadful potatoes? No one else seemed to find it peculiar. Well, DUH! They weren't the ones to wake up in the middle of the night to hear a potato screaming. Theyweren't the ones who had their dreams being haunted by nothing but potatoes for three dys. And now he had a whole bunch of them for breakfast. Ugh!

"Oh Heika. You have to finish some paper work you neglected yesterday." Gwendal announced.

"Yeah, okay..." First potatoes, and now paperwork. Maybe today was being cursed by the letter 'P'?

After a 'Marvelous' breakfast, he dragged himself upstairs to finish his paperwork. For a change, he decided to read some of the papers he was signing. After he did, he found out he shouldn't have.

_'I, Yuri Shibuya, 27th Maoh of Shin Makoku hereby declare that after three years, all of Shin Makoku's potatoes will be given to Big Shimaron.' _Yuri gaped. He skipped it, and picked up the next one.

_'I, Yuri Shibuya, 27th Maoh of Shin Makoku hereby declare that in Shin Makoku the 26th of December will be celebrated as National Potato Day.' _He skipped that one too, and reached for the next one.

_'I, Yuri Shibuya, 27th Maoh of Shin Makoku hereby declare that for one year the citizens of the great and Noble country, Shin Makoku, must have nothing but potatoes for breakfast.' _Yuri screamed and fled. Gwendal turned around (He was in the room too) .

"Hmph. He ran out on his paperwork again."

******

For once, Yuri was looking forward to Gunter's lessons. He didn't know why. He just felt like it would be a distraction. From what? Potatoes? If he had thought it would be a distraction, from potatoes (Which he did), he was wrong.

"Ah, The history of the Magnificent house of Potatoes is extremely interesting!" Gunter's eyes turned dreamy. "First, you have the Palaeolithic Potatoes, which are dark-brown, with light-brown spots, and then the Mesolithic Potatoes, which are..."

Yuri screamed again, and ran out the door. He didn't notice the two people who were standing outside when he ran. He just wanted to get away from those dreadful potatoes. The two people (being Murata and Shinou) turned around. That is, Murata turned around with Shinou on his shoulder.

"Maybe you went a bit too far..."

Shinou shrugged, "Perhaps."

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Thankyou for reading! Please review.

P.S. If my sister joins this site, I'll give the story back to her.


	2. Epilogue

Okay, this is my epilogue to my sister's story, inspired by the fact that SHINOU MUST BE PUNISHED AT ALL COSTS!!! Please read and review.

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Epilogue;

Shinou looked at the highly irritated great sage who was standing before him.

"Honestly my sage, it must have been a coincidence. I had nothing to do with it."

"And why should I believe that?" The sage asked, muted candle light from the temple glinting dangerously on his glasses.

"He must have contracted the disease somewhere else." Shinou told him. The spirit waved his hands in the air as he continued. "Besides, it's not even fatal."

Murata's voice was deathly cold, like a knife. "That disease was completely eradicated in the time of the 7th Maoh."

"Well now, if it had, could you please tell me why the Maoh is now in bed with a case of it, my dear sage?"

The great sage, had taken many different forms and many different lives in the course of four thousand years. In all that time, he had never yet found anyone who could make him explode as much as the very first Maoh of Shin Makoku could. Yes, Shinou was very very talented.

"SHINOU YOU TOTAL IDIOT, JUST HOW DUMB DO YOU THINK I AM? DO YOU THINK THAT I'D ACCEPT YOUR STUPID EXCUSE, AND BELIEVE THAT SHIBUYA CONTRACTED POTATO-POX, A DISEASE _I _HELPED ERADICATE THREE THOUSAND YEARS AGO, FROM SOME RANDOM SOURCE? AND I'M SUPPOSED TO JUST FORGET THE FACT THAT YOU PLAYED THAT STUPID, AND _HIGHLY CHILDISH _TRICK ON SHIBUYA, WHICH SURPRISINGLY STARRED, _**POTATOES?**_"

"I knew it!" Shinou exclaimed happily. "You're only upset because you made a mistake and didn't manage to get rid of that disease!" he said. Floating closer, he poked his speechless sage's nose. "_You_ should take anger management classes. It's not good to be so disappointed about something you failed to do three thousand years ago. You can always do it now!"

Lifting up a glowing fist, Murata punched the annoying spirit. "You're absolutely right, I owed this to you a long time ago." he said, calm once more, before he started pummeling Shinou.

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Epilogue Epilogue;

"This is it! You're having a nervous breakdown! You need to calm down to clear your negative aura! You should try meditat-"

There was a strangled noise, and a loud bang. Shinou's voice stopped abruptly. The shrine maidens couldn't help but wonder why.

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Fin.

Okay, I know there's no such thing as an epilogue-epilogue, but who cares? Please Review!


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